E kam edhe une nje kenge si cdo njeri. Dhe shpesh here me duhet te punoj qe melodia e kenges sime apo dhe fjalet e saj te dalin positive, shprese-ndjellese. Dua te fokusohem vetem tek ky aspekt. Dua te shoh realitetin e gotes sime gjysem te mbushur me uje. Ka dite qe shoh me shume problemet, dhimbjen, frikerat, pasigurite dhe eshte atehere kur me duhet ti drejtohem Zotit te me re-frame, menyren time te menduarit. Dhe ndodh sa here qe flas me te.
I call it "my therapy session with daddy."
I cry my heart out in prayer and he calms me down and i find myself to be in a strange state of peace. Like the Bible says in the letters apostle Paul wrote to the Philippians church in the 1st century, to have a peace that passes understanding (i can't understand it, how one moment i am agitated and after talking to him, i am content) and the problematic situation might not change at all ,the problems are still there, they could even become worse,yet i am at peace because he has helped me see the situation with a different perspective, and even given me strength to face harder things. One of those harder things is to help treat people with all sorts of problems from borderline personality disorder, PTSD, bipolar dis, depression, substance abuse,anger management issues,sexual addictions, co-depedent/ dysfunctional relationship issues,schizoaffective dis, delusional and even clients who are so out of touch with reality that sadly all one can do is maintenance work with them and moreover Trichotillomania ( hairpulling) yeah even that..... like the Bible says in Ecclesiastes : 'there's everything under the sun and nothing is hidden from it ,' as long as there's people around. But when i see the group, in the therapy session, when i see i am surrounded by them all in one room, knowing they could trigger one-another to harmful behavior( after all, they all have 2 or 3 dis at the same time, almost all have Suicidal ideation) when I see them, and their interaction with each-other, I marvel at humanity.
) I see strength. I see determination.I see the tools they can use ,that God himself has equipped them w/o them knowing to find the healing inside. I see that God loves people equally the same even though they have gone through so much pain. I believe that pain has been for a reason, which i don't know because it's in God's plans. But one reason i can find is they are in the clinic where i am at so i may pray for them and their healing. I see pain but amids the pain, God helps me see hope and that's why I sing.