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-- Femrat kundra Meshkujve (http://www.forumihorizont.com/showthread.php3?threadid=7340)

Femrat kundra Meshkujve

Ai tha: S'e kuptoj pse vesh sutjena, ti s'ke me c'fare ti mbushesh
Ajo thao ti pse vesh b..ke?

Kush eshte e vetmja gje e perbashket e meshkujve ne nje lokal beqaresh?
Ata jane te martuar.

Mashkulli e pyet Zotin: Zot pse i bere femrat kaq te bukura? - Qe ju di doni
Por Zot pse i bere kaq budallaqe? Qe ato t'ju duan ju.

Pse jane shakate e femrave te shkurtra? Qe meshkujt ti mbajne mend

Ai tha: Ku i cove leket qe te dhashe per te blere ushqime?
Ajo tha: Ktheu anash dhe shiko veten ne pasqyre.

Sa burra duhen qe te zvendesojne letren e banjes kur mbaron? Nuk dihet.S'ka ndodhur ndonjehere

Pse eshte kaq e veshtire te gjesh meshkuj te pashem te sjellshem etj? Sepse ata kane te dashnore.

Have fun

Men's rules ...( time for revenge lol)

Men always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note ... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!


1
Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us bitching about you leaving it down.


1
Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!


1
Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.


1
Don’t cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you’re stuck with her.


1
Shopping is not fascinating

1
Crying is blackmail.


1
Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints don’t do it!


1
We don’t remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.


1
Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we’d be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?


1
Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.


1
Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.


1
Check your oil! Please.


1
Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.


1
If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.


1
If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.


1
Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it’s genetic.


1
You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.


1
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.


1
Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.


1
The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it and quit whining to your girlfriends.


1
If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.


1
If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.


1
If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.


1
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.


1
Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the offside rule, investments or cars.


1
You have enough clothes.


1
You have too many shoes.


1
It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn’t matter which quiz.


1
BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.


1
I’m in shape. ROUND is a shape.


...

unstoppable

...becouse revenge is a bitch, Just returning the favor..hahaha
here's some more:

He said..Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said..That's a good idea-Your stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa


Why are married women heavier than single women?
Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in the bed and go to the fridge.


What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A widow


How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
He buyes two cases of beer


What is the difference between men and government bonds?
The bonds mature


There is married man and anmarried minds


The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby


Be kind to animals - Kiss a man today.

ahhahahhahhahah shum funny keto
XOXOXO

Re: Men's rules ...( time for revenge lol)

Citim:

---

Po citoj ato që tha Unstoppable
Men always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note ... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!


1
Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us bitching about you leaving it down.


1
Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!


1
Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.


1
Don’t cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you’re stuck with her.


1
Shopping is not fascinating

1
Crying is blackmail.


1
Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints don’t do it!


1
We don’t remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.


1
Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we’d be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?


1
Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.


1
Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.


1
Check your oil! Please.


1
Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.


1
If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.


1
If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.


1
Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it’s genetic.


1
You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.


1
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.


1
Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.


1
The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it and quit whining to your girlfriends.


1
If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.


1
If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.


1
If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.


1
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.


1
Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the offside rule, investments or cars.


1
You have enough clothes.


1
You have too many shoes.


1
It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn’t matter which quiz.


1
BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.


1
I’m in shape. ROUND is a shape.


...

---

Re: Men's rules ...( time for revenge lol)

Citim:

---

Po citoj ato që tha Unstoppable
Men always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note ... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!


1
Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us bitching about you leaving it down.


1
Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!


1
Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.


1
Don’t cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you’re stuck with her.


1
Shopping is not fascinating

1
Crying is blackmail.


1
Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints don’t do it!


1
We don’t remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.


1
Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we’d be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?


1
Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.


1
Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.


1
Check your oil! Please.


1
Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.


1
If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.


1
If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.


1
Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it’s genetic.


1
You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.


1
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.


1
Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.


1
The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it and quit whining to your girlfriends.


1
If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.


1
If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.


1
If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.


1
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.


1
Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the offside rule, investments or cars.


1
You have enough clothes.


1
You have too many shoes.


1
It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn’t matter which quiz.


1
BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.


1
I’m in shape. ROUND is a shape.


...

---

Re: Re: Men's rules ...( time for revenge lol)

Citim:

---

Po citoj ato që tha danielxhd


__________________________________________________
______

cpatet ju more pse ja kthyet ne anglisht? ne te tjeret nuk dime anglisht si tja bejme?

---

Re: Re: Re: Men's rules ...( time for revenge lol)

Citim:

---

Po citoj ato që tha _mIzZzA_


te keshillojm ta mesosh se shpejti prandaj ta vem ne anglisht

---

Re: Re: Re: Re: Men's rules ...( time for revenge lol)

Citim:

---

Po citoj ato që tha danielxhd


__________________________________________________
_________


tani per tani nuk kam mundesi te mesoj,por megjithate do mundohem. po deshet greqish tju them. thank you.

---

Bashing Men Jokes

Why are men like popcorn?
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.


Why so many women have fake orgasm?
Becouse so many men fake foreplay?


What do men and woman have in common?
They both distrust men.


Why do men have a hole in their penis?
So oxygen can get to their brains.
----------------------------


Tani po i perkrahim pak meshkujt....

Why men can't win!!!

If you try to keep yourself in shape you are vain
If you don't, you're slob.


If you buy her flowers, you're after something
If you don't, you're not thoughtful


If you're proud of your achievements you are an egoist
If you're not, you are not ambitious


If she has a headache, she's tired
If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore and you must be sleeping around


If you work too hard, there is never any time for her
If you don't work enough, you're a good-for nothing bum