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- *He said, she said* (http://www.forumihorizont.com/forumdisplay.php3?forumid=325)
-- Are we better off on our own? (http://www.forumihorizont.com/showthread.php3?threadid=6610)
Postuar nga hirushja datë 07 Nëntor 2004 - 19:40:
Are we better off on our own?
We are born the same and we all somehow have had someone to look after us when we were young. Not just to feed us but to love us and comfort us. So, through out life we have gone through stages were we've always had someone to care for us.
Now, some of us like the idea of being single and some think that we need a companion through out life.
What do you think? Are we better alone now a days, is it worth to risk something in your life for love?
Postuar nga darke datë 17 Nëntor 2004 - 09:01:
Re: Are we better off on our own?
I think human being lives between two worlds. In a hand we are individuals, alone in our own world, own mind, single contact with the "outside" reality...
In other hand we are "social and political animals" by nature as Aristoteles said (was Aristoteles?). Nobody can live totally alone, also I don't think it is healthy for his/her mind. But also it's true that there are single people. By the way, I think there are 4 women for each man, so 3 women live single, and if you add that there are single men... so more single women to add
.
Always we are needed of others, not only when we are born because of the food to survive but when we are adults; is not sex a physiological need?. I think our nature is to reproduce us, and if you want to reproduce you firstly have to find a partner. So maybe love is a mental construction of what we feel phisycally.
In my own experience, I feel I was born with a kind of emptiness and I hope that "hole" will be filled up by somebody, my lover??? I don't know if I think like this because I have learned it from the culture or it is spontaneous.
It's kinda complicated to think about this, but I'm totally sure that solitude is not good if it comes to you when you don't want it.
Postuar nga qorri datë 18 Nëntor 2004 - 23:39:
I would anser to you by saying that is very good to be single. Specialy if you are someone like me that like your freedom more than anything else in the world."I don't need a partner when i can have 100" usually I say when somebody asks me why i cant stay whith the same girl for more than two weeks. I've taken a big decision not ever to stay whith the same person for more than two weeks.I hope to always be single and never fall in love again.
Honestly i am scared, so scared that nobody can imagine. The real anser to the question is "we definitly need somebody to hug together". When you get back home from a hard days work and you feel exausted there is nothing beter than a kiss and a big hug.Probabily seat together on a couch for a while not say a word just looking at your girl and keeping her tight, i so much miss that.Usualy every once in a while i feel like i am feeling now but as soon as i get to know somebody i get scared and "cut it short".
Again hope thate i never fall in love again and to always be single.
Postuar nga lorie datë 19 Nëntor 2004 - 00:37:
Are we better alone now a days, is it worth to risk something in your life for love?
For years i have felt a big whole of emtpiness,of a meaningless life. I was in search of something to get filled.
The thing that was missing was love. And i thought being alone was cool ,was the greatest thing in the world,no responsabilities, no strings attached. Like Ravik in Triumph's Arch .He didn't want any relationships because he wanted to be free, "indipendent".Me too, i hate strings.Freedom is very important for me.
After a while ,i got tired, i wanted to feel, i wanted to change my reality.
And now i am learning that man is not made to be alone.He definitely needs a companion. Solitude and privacy is fine, you can have that indipendence even when you are in a relationship. The trick is to learn that art...
What i was afraid and still am is the risk of getting hurt.
But i am risking sth in my life for love :i am being opened to attacks,i am finally letting people know my very vulnerable parts of my character.
Postuar nga Aljohin datë 22 Nëntor 2004 - 20:56:
Well muslim males can have 4 wives at once. Than the singles are less than you think or than they think.
Ta dije dhe ai se c’do me thane i dobet, n’agoni t’perdihet si vigan i vrame.
Postuar nga darke datë 23 Nëntor 2004 - 05:13:
Citim:
Po citoj ato që tha Aljohin
Well muslim males can have 4 wives at once. Than the singles are less than you think or than they think.
I'm sure you would be pleased to contribute to the muslim cause, right?:p
Postuar nga Klodel datë 23 Nëntor 2004 - 21:17:
Re: Are we better alone now a days, is it worth to risk something in your life for love?
Citim:
Po citoj ato që tha lorie
For years i have felt a big whole of emtpiness,of a meaningless life. I was in search of something to get filled.
The thing that was missing was love. And i thought being alone was cool ,was the greatest thing in the world,no responsabilities, no strings attached. Like Ravik in Triumph's Arch .He didn't want any relationships because he wanted to be free, "indipendent".Me too, i hate strings.Freedom is very important for me.
After a while ,i got tired, i wanted to feel, i wanted to change my reality.
And now i am learning that man is not made to be alone.He definitely needs a companion. Solitude and privacy is fine, you can have that indipendence even when you are in a relationship. The trick is to learn that art...
What i was afraid and still am is the risk of getting hurt.
But i am risking sth in my life for love :i am being opened to attacks,i am finally letting people know my very vulnerable parts of my character.
Its always better to risk for love, otherwise you can never understand what love is. you can never understand what lies behind its depth, you can never understand yourself either. if you don't get hurt you can't be strong, if you don't suffer you don't know what happiness mean, you don't know the value of things. Don't be affraid of suffering, You will always be stronger nothing lasts. neither the sufferings nor the happiness, the stronger the pain, the greater the beauty of soul.
The only thing you should never risk for love is your future. you should put urself in the first place, your future your career then the feelings. At least i don't do compromises in this point. the price is very high nevertheless I feel my independence and self fulfillment is for the moment much more important than putting it at risk for the sake of love.
let me bring a poem i read in the forum and I like it very much
NGADALE VDES...
Dalngadale vdes ai qe behet skllav i zakonit,
qe perserit to njejtat gjera cdo dite,
qe nuk ndryshon rruge,
qe nuk rrezikon,
qe nuk ndryshon ngjyren e veshjeve,
qe nuk i flet atij qe nuk a njeh.
Dalngadale vdes ai qe nuk permbys tryezen,
qe eshte i pakenaqur nga puna,
qe nuk rrezikon sigurine nga pasiguria per te ndjekur nje enderr,
qe nuk i lejon vetes asnjehere ne jete to thyeje rregullat a vendosura.
Dalngadale vdes ai qe nuk udheton,
qe nuk lexon,
qe nuk degjon muzike,
qe nuk zbulon hijeshi tek vetja a tij.
Dalngadale vdes ai qe shperfill krenarine e tij,
qe nuk i le te tjeret ta ndihmojne,
qe i kalon ditet duke u qare per fatin e tij te keq,
qe ankohet per shiun qe nuk pushon.
Dalngadale vdes ai qe i shmanget projektit para se to filloje,
qe nuk pyet per gjerat qe nuk i di,
dhe qe nuk pergjigjet per gjerat qe di.
E shmangim vdekjen me doza te vogla,
duke kujtuar gjithmone se te jesh gjalle
kerkon nje perpjekje shume me te madhe
se thjeshte fakti qe marrim fryme.
Vetem durimi i paepur
do te na beje te arrijme
lumturine me te madhe.
Postuar nga hirushja datë 25 Nëntor 2004 - 01:55:
Analistja that's the key. Once you get hurt then it will be very difficult for you to trust another person. Everything that comes out of their feelings might seem to me or somebody else, as if they don't mean it.
People quite like the idea of being single. It is the worryness that they fear. It is the jealousy and the stress that they get through the relationship. Anyway things might change when you get to a certain age. Now I wanna feel like a bird.
Postuar nga rrushi datë 25 Nëntor 2004 - 02:55:
There is something to be said about being self-sufficient. You don’t rely on anyone for your happiness, completeness, fun etc. I started contemplating a career in being single once I felt that regressed childish safety of being tied up with an umbilical cord. This is a very personal question and hopefully we can be honest with ourselves when answering it. I know I need to cut the cord and it’s scary as shit. But at the end of the day it all about reminding myself that no matter what happens with the other person or the relationship, no matter how much risk I have to take, or how scary it is to jump, no matter how much it hurts, I will be OK by myself.
Postuar nga Aljohin datë 26 Nëntor 2004 - 18:09:
Oh woman you are so superficial! I will be pleased to contribute to the cause of the singles. I am thinking about the others not about my self, woman
Citim:
Po citoj ato që tha darke
I'm sure you would be pleased to contribute to the muslim cause, right?:p