Deb*

Regjistruar: 08/02/2007
Vendbanimi: diku aty, prane......
Mesazhe: 5515

the funniest blonde joke


I knew a blonde that was so stupid that.......

* she called me to get my phone number.

* she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate."

* she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.

*she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

*she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

*she tried to drown a fish.

*she thought a quarterback was a refund.

*she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.

*she tripped over a cordless phone.

*she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.

*she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.

*she studied for a blood test.

*she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.

*when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.

*when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.

*when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home

__________________
Te dua, jo per ate qe je, por per ate qe me ben te ndihem.

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   Deb*

Regjistruar: 08/02/2007
Vendbanimi: diku aty, prane......
Mesazhe: 5515

You've got mail!


A blonde keeps walking down her drive to her mail box.

She keeps doing this until her neighbour asks her why she is doing that.

The blonde replies "My computer keeps telling me that i've got mail".

__________________
Te dua, jo per ate qe je, por per ate qe me ben te ndihem.

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   Deb*

Regjistruar: 08/02/2007
Vendbanimi: diku aty, prane......
Mesazhe: 5515

NEW INVENTIONS BY BLONDES:

The water-proof towel

Glow in the dark sunglasses

Solar powered flashlight

Submarine screen door

A book on how to read

Inflatable dart board

A dictionary index

Powdered water

Pedal powered wheel chair

Water proof tea bags

Zero proof alcohol

Reusable ice cubes

Skinless bananas

Do it yourself roadmap

__________________
Te dua, jo per ate qe je, por per ate qe me ben te ndihem.

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   Deb*

Regjistruar: 08/02/2007
Vendbanimi: diku aty, prane......
Mesazhe: 5515

just plain dumb


A blonde and a redhead were sitting together having drinks, when the blonde noticed a man walking towards them with an arm full of long stem red roses. The blonde says to the redhead, "isn't that your husband coming carrying all those roses?"

The redhead says, yes it is.

The blonde responds by saying, "Oh you are so lucky".

The redhead says, "No I'm not. All that means is that I have to spend the whole week-end flat on my back, with my legs in the air and spread apart."

The blonde says, "Oh my, don't you have a vase to put them in"?

__________________
Te dua, jo per ate qe je, por per ate qe me ben te ndihem.

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   Deb*

Regjistruar: 08/02/2007
Vendbanimi: diku aty, prane......
Mesazhe: 5515

Library Fast food

A blonde went in the library and walked up to the librarian behind the desk and said, "I would like a cheeseburger."

The librarian replied,"Shh! This is a library!" The blonde blushed. "oh, sorry.." then she whispered, "I would like a cheeseburger."

__________________
Te dua, jo per ate qe je, por per ate qe me ben te ndihem.

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   Deb*

Regjistruar: 08/02/2007
Vendbanimi: diku aty, prane......
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Lesbian

A blonde guy was sitting in a bar when he spots a very pretty young woman. He advances towards her when the bartender says to him,

"Don't waste your time on that one. She's a lesbian." The blonde goes over to her anyway and says, "So which part of Lesbia are you from?"

__________________
Te dua, jo per ate qe je, por per ate qe me ben te ndihem.

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   Deb*

Regjistruar: 08/02/2007
Vendbanimi: diku aty, prane......
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Jealous Revenge

A Blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so She goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and sure enough, she opens the door and finds him in the arms of a redhead.

Well, the blonde is angry, She opens her purse to take out the gun but as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.

The boyfriend yells "No, honey, don't do it." The blond replies "Shut up, you're next."

__________________
Te dua, jo per ate qe je, por per ate qe me ben te ndihem.

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   Deb*

Regjistruar: 08/02/2007
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Only three doors

An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.

The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"

The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"

__________________
Te dua, jo per ate qe je, por per ate qe me ben te ndihem.

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   Deb*

Regjistruar: 08/02/2007
Vendbanimi: diku aty, prane......
Mesazhe: 5515

A Blonde Goes On Who Wants To Be A Millionaire


Regis: "Barbara, you've done very well so far - $500,000 and one lifeline left -- phone a friend.

The next question will give you the top prize of One Million dollars if you get it right ... but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32,000 -- are you ready?"

Barbara: "Sure, I'll have a go!"

Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build it's own nest?

Is it........

A-Robin

B-Sparrow

C-Cuckoo

D-Thrush

Remember Barbara its worth 1 Million dollars."

"I think I know who it..but I'm not 100%...

No, I haven't got a clue. I'd like to phone a friend Regis, just to be sure.

Regis: "Yes, who, Barbara, do you want to phone?

Barbara: "I'll phone my friend Maggie back home in Birmingham."

(ringing)

Maggie (also a blonde): "Hello..."

Regis: "Hello Maggie, its Regis here from Who Wants to be a Millionaire-I have Barbara here and she is doing really well on $500,000, but needs your help to be a Million.

The next voice you hear will be Barbara's and she'll read you the question.

There are 4 possible answers and 1 correct answer and you have 30 seconds to answer -- fire away Barbara."

Barbara: "Maggie, which of the following birds does not build it's own nest? Is it:

A-Robin

B-Sparrow

C-Cuckoo

D-Thrush"

Maggie: "Oh Gees, Barbara that's simple.....It's a Cuckoo."

Barbara: "You think?"

Maggie: "I'm sure."

Barbara: " Thanks Maggie." (hangs up)

Regis: "Well, do you want to stick on $500,000 or play on for the Million, Barbara?"

Barbara: "I want to play, I'll go with C-Cuckoo"

Regis: "Is that your final answer?"

Barbara: "It is."

Regis: "Are you confident?"

Barbara: "Yes fairly, Maggie's a sound bet."

Regis: "Barbara.....you had $500,000 and you said C-Cuckoo ...you're right! - You have just won ONE MILLION DOLLARS.

Here is your check. You have been a great contestant and a real gambler. Audience please put your hands together for Barbara."

(clapping)

That night Barbara calls round to Maggie and brings her down to a local bar for a celebration drink and, as they are sipping their Champagne, Barbara turns to Maggie and asks "Tell me Maggie, How in God's name did you know that it was the Cuckoo that does not build its own nest?

Maggie: "Listen Barbara, everybody knows that a Cuckoo lives in a clock."

__________________
Te dua, jo per ate qe je, por per ate qe me ben te ndihem.

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   Deb*

Regjistruar: 08/02/2007
Vendbanimi: diku aty, prane......
Mesazhe: 5515

21, 21, 21


There's a brunette walking down a set of railroad tracks saying,"21, 21, 21..."

Then a blonde pulls up, gets out of her car, and says, "What are you doing?"

The brunette replies, "Just counting."

The blonde says, "May I join you?"

"Yes," replies the brunette.

So the blonde and the brunette are now both walking down the railroad tracks saying," 21, 21, 21..."

A train comes and the brunette jumps off the tracks as the blonde gets hit.

After the train passes, the brunette gets back on the tracks and says,"22, 22, 22..."

__________________
Te dua, jo per ate qe je, por per ate qe me ben te ndihem.

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